Please welcome Cameron, my guest blogger, who has been in touch as he'd like to share his amazing story through my blog......
My wife Heather was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma on November 21, 2005. Though I was unprepared to be a caregiver, I was willing and determined to take the challenge for my wife and daughter. Approximately three months prior to the diagnosis, our daughter, Lily, was born. We had been excitedly looking forward to celebrating her first holiday together as a family. Instead, our lives turned to utter chaos as we began a long and difficult battle with cancer.
Upon hearing the diagnosis, Heather was in
shock. The doctor laid out several options available for treatment. There were two hospitals nearby that could
treat Heather, but neither of them had a well-developed program for this rare
cancer. So, I chose a Boston mesothelioma specialist, Dr. David Sugarbaker. Heather was too shocked and paralyzed by fear
to make a decision, but I knew that if she were to have any chance of beating
mesothelioma, she would need the best care available.
We had to learn new ways to live our lives over the following months. My wife had to stop working after the diagnosis, and I could only work part-time in order to be there for my family. I used my time away from work to take care of my daughter, to arrange my wife’s doctor’s appointments, and to arrange travel to Boston for treatments and doctor’s visits. I was overwhelmed on many days.
I did my best to always stay positive, but sometimes I could only picture the worst. I often thought that we would end up broke and homeless fighting the disease. I often wondered how I could ever get by if I lost my wife, and was left alone to raise Lily by myself. Many days, I would lie in my kitchen floor and cry because I felt helpless. Despite my feelings, I knew I had to remain strong. I never let Heather see me in these weak moments. I knew I had to be her rock, and that the last thing she needed was to see how scared I truly was.
Help came to us when we truly needed it. We received comforting words and even financial assistance from friends, family, and complete strangers. The job of caregiver is stressful enough, there is no reason you should try to do it alone. My strongest advice to anyone in a similar situation is to be brave enough to ask for help. There is no room for pride in a battle with cancer. You should use all the resources provided to you no matter how big or small to help you remain sane and strong in this fight.
After mesothelioma surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy, it took years for our lives to return to normal, but Heather beat the odds and is cancer-free today. During my wife’s cancer battle, I learned to cope with stress, and I learned time management skills. More importantly, I learned the strength that each person has inside them. Two years after Heather’s diagnosis, I returned to school while working full time, to pursue my dream of earning my college degree. When I graduated, I was chosen to be the graduation speaker of the class. In my speech, I spoke of hope and my wife’s experience. I talked about how, just a few years earlier, I never could have pictured myself up on that stage. I told my fellow graduates about the lessons my wife had taught me, that within each of us is the strength to accomplish incredible, unimaginable things, as long as we never give up, and always keep fighting.
We had to learn new ways to live our lives over the following months. My wife had to stop working after the diagnosis, and I could only work part-time in order to be there for my family. I used my time away from work to take care of my daughter, to arrange my wife’s doctor’s appointments, and to arrange travel to Boston for treatments and doctor’s visits. I was overwhelmed on many days.
I did my best to always stay positive, but sometimes I could only picture the worst. I often thought that we would end up broke and homeless fighting the disease. I often wondered how I could ever get by if I lost my wife, and was left alone to raise Lily by myself. Many days, I would lie in my kitchen floor and cry because I felt helpless. Despite my feelings, I knew I had to remain strong. I never let Heather see me in these weak moments. I knew I had to be her rock, and that the last thing she needed was to see how scared I truly was.
Help came to us when we truly needed it. We received comforting words and even financial assistance from friends, family, and complete strangers. The job of caregiver is stressful enough, there is no reason you should try to do it alone. My strongest advice to anyone in a similar situation is to be brave enough to ask for help. There is no room for pride in a battle with cancer. You should use all the resources provided to you no matter how big or small to help you remain sane and strong in this fight.
After mesothelioma surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy, it took years for our lives to return to normal, but Heather beat the odds and is cancer-free today. During my wife’s cancer battle, I learned to cope with stress, and I learned time management skills. More importantly, I learned the strength that each person has inside them. Two years after Heather’s diagnosis, I returned to school while working full time, to pursue my dream of earning my college degree. When I graduated, I was chosen to be the graduation speaker of the class. In my speech, I spoke of hope and my wife’s experience. I talked about how, just a few years earlier, I never could have pictured myself up on that stage. I told my fellow graduates about the lessons my wife had taught me, that within each of us is the strength to accomplish incredible, unimaginable things, as long as we never give up, and always keep fighting.
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